come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Randomize
