But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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