Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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