How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize