i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize