just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize