69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
