haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
