My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
