Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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