I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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