So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Randomize
