And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
