whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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