I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
