my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
