He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Randomize