If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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