All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
