And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
this is an emotional support booty call
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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