We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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