I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
