I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
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