id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize