Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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