He disabled his match.com account in front of me
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
