Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Just puked most of my soul out..
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
