im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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