I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
