Yo dont text me then not text me
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
We're using joints as your birthday candles
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
