her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
