i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
