Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
