Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
