Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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