these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
