just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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