Whoa Z and x make the same sound
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
