Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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