They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
