This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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