At least make sure they are 18
Why
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize