ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize