Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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