did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
You are the jesus of drinking
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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