i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
