the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
