You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
