your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Randomize