I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
